pizza slow high quality

Twitter posts from 2011

  1. @slp22 thanks Sandra!

  2. Golf is such an enigma to me. http://t.co/Kpn2zpKF

  3. I’m moving charmsec.org to a new registrar a few days before @CharmSec 43 because I passive aggressively like breaking MediaWiki sites.

  4. RT @GAJoaby: @ibogost new game idea - you sign up and immediately have to reset your password. All you ever do is reset it.

  5. @johnconstable not to Android.

  6. RT @biorhythmist: How old were you when you found out that Santana wasn’t real?

  7. RT @GoldbergLawDC: Chris Hitchens, one of the great writers of our generation, died yesterday. Hitch was once called Americas foremost r …

  8. @davidmoffitt @sxs3200 “Churchill and 007 martinis are nonsense up with which I will not put.”

  9. eight, equals, equals, capital-D

  10.  Twitter.app 2.1.2

    • Fixed “Open links in background” setting
    • →, →→, →→→, etc now opens consecutive links in toots

  11. OH: I really like that word by the way. It’s like sexy but it’s “regexy.”

  12. I, personally, have never read a man page on my own time, and would never do it on the company’s dollar or the government’s dole. #hashtag

  13. @mckt_ enough bartenders get the dry martini wrong that I wonder if it’s de facto now, like shaking it, or using vodka.

  14. RT @PeterSokolowski: To those who say they only use ‘decimate’ to mean “reduce by one tenth,” I say: how do you use ‘quintessential’?? # …

  15. The only nice thing I have to say about OSX Lion Server is that the nat service can be replaced with a shell script.

  16. @sxs3200 @vurtyou any time!

  17. @bbaskin the first @charmsec conversation I had with you was because I disagreed with a talk you gave at @dojosec, and you changed my mind.

  18. @sxs3200 CISCO, THE GATEKEEPER OF GOZER

  19. Mid-November and I’m still thinking “well that sure is a neat costume, wonder what it’s supposed to be of?” of people in The Mission.

  20. @kidkoala RT @newmoticons KOALA ! ━━► ᒓᴥᒔ

  21. RT @DEVOPS_BORAT: R is bc for hipster.

  22. *Thus the remark attributed to W.H. Auden: “Let me see what I wrote so I know what I think.”

    http://t.co/pc6ZvdDB

  23. RT @fromedome: Pretty sure Google’s disconnect with society hits its peak here. So ridiculous, it’s almost a parody of itself. http://t. …

  24. RT @rattle1337: Video of the counter-espionage talk I gave at SDC can be viewed online: http://t.co/J32Dpa2c #APT

  25. Every morning I wake up and read MS UDP vuln headlines and open palm slam a #fail into the echo chamber w/ linkbait.

    http://t.co/UKiIkycb

  26. SMTP has had MAIL FROM: <> null reverse paths since 1982. Web developers still spoof envelope senders to match recipient addresses in 2011.

  27. @skype hey so like I use skype.app on multiple Macs, and each of them randomly escapes ’ like stuff to ' like stuff and it’s lame. Sup?

  28. ★★★★★ Stavely, 2011

    “Grant is proud to abandon RSS as a waste of mortality, but embarrassed to have ditched television and driving first.”

  29. @mrgan by forcing you to dig for every tissue, they perform an environmental reminder to consider the life of a tree.

    Or to use your shirt.

  30. RT @DEVOPS_BORAT: In startup we are hire only rockstar, ninja or samurai. Vague familiar with computer is big plus.

  31. I sure hope my patent-applied-for Ultra-Magnetic Cat Litter doesn’t cause as many ‘incidents’ as my patented Ultra-Magnetic Cat Food did.

  32. I’m gonna go out on a limb and say “Help, I don’t know how to get down outta this tree!” --A Cat

  33. Fucking speech acts, how do they work?

  34. /etc/sysconfig/ and /etc/default/ are directories for configuration files in a directory for configuration files.

  35. @schuetzdj @textfiles seconded. I did some consulting for customink.com when they were growing, seemed like good peoples.

  36. @mckt_ even a disgusting Watermelon beer can’t break the “all beer is good” rule.

  37. @MikD but I’ve been trying to figure out AirTunes for years: http://t.co/CNp8ixbI

  38. @MikD Mine will intermittently keep playing w/ no sound but never mid-song. Cordless phone? Microwave? Switch from/to 5GHz from/to 2.4?

  39. I like to chew candy corn with the few all original, non-filled, non-crowned teeth I have left so’s to keep 'em in line.

  40. I upgraded to a Pro™ account and am strolling through an infinite VRML strip mall of your postings, in a gel-submerged aerotrim and goggles.

  41. @sxs3200 That keyboard looks really nice but at that price, I’d demand gold plated optical interconnects and a beefy ferrite core, minimum.

  42. RT @flantz: My thoughts on Cow Clicker, in case you were wondering. http://t.co/zLEqTv8X

  43. @AWS0807 GABF tip: Drop your cup for a round of applause!

  44. wood-engraved-rabbit

    I N F O G R A P H I C S
    I N A N U T S H E L L

    http://t.co/rdXe3JKt

  45. @dtjedi I like @routesy

  46. “I only wear a helmet when I’m drunk and other bicyclists are wearing helmets, so like, you know, I’m totally in control of it.”

  47. @MikD @chipmonkey @vurtyou http://t.co/TjOz0B0k

  48. RT @scottsimpson: “If there were only a way to make kids have to shave…”

    —Somebody at Procter & Gamble, right now

  49. “We’ve always been business partners with Adbusters.”

  50. RT @DEVOPS_BORAT: Scratch surface of any CTO and you find junior devops + Peter Principle.

  51. “Tank, I need a program for giving a presentation like Steve Jobs. Hurry.”

  52. Corollary: If the ideas are assertions of negativity, conspiracy, or peeves; the value is certainly nil.

  53. If the best description for a collection of ideas in a thing is the number of ideas in the thing, the value of any one idea is probably nil.

  54. AirTunes is simultaneously my favorite Mac ecosystem thing and the worst: the non-UDP half of the protocol seems to lack introspection.

  55. RT @rands: Don’t be so f*king strategic : http://t.co/Mr7LNH8t

  56. “Something there is that doesn’t love a firewall.”

  57. This breach notification is a Sierpinski Triangle of precious foolishness:
    http://t.co/5FzcDl2

  58. @grahamvsworld @alexhutton @daviottenheimer NOVA area cyber-JO is like simultaneously loving and completely misunderstanding Dr. Strangelove

  59. @LucasErratus attack source fallacy reminds me of @judy_novak’s hilarious (and I paraphrase) “IANA! I’m being attacked by 127.0.0/8!” story.

  60. RT @kylekinane: THIS YACHT KILLS FASCISTS

  61. “Heh, you just wait, it gets even worse after you’ve—” is the universal bad-advice prefix.

  62. “I told you a registration wall wouldn’t suit the works!” he added looking angrily at the March Hare.

    “It was the /best/ registration wall”

  63. @ssoper Cat’s_Cradle, Slapstick, and Breakfast_of_Champions are all excellent.

  64. “The crystal I wear around my neck contains an essence that gets recharged when I Project Manage with a bro who also has a crystal.”

  65. 'patawork: “The science of imaginary solutions, which symbolically attributes the properties of objects, described…”

    http://t.co/67EViMn

  66. Mr. Boddy was killed by Project Manager NewGuy (PMP, CPM, MBA), in the conference room, with the business requirements document.

  67. If it ain’t fixed, don’t break it.

  68. If you don’t have a I-am-sarcasticly-handwaving-this gesture, you’re probably a handwaver.

  69. Alright, I didn’t wanna have to do this, but from now on, anyone that mentions bitcoins is gonna have to put some real coins in this jar.

  70. “misting the ol’ parakeet”
    “watering the birdie”
    “washing the do-do baby”
    “the old man in the park sprays one handed” http://t.co/Hx4xnxZ

  71. RT @sbnation: We debated this for a while, but then remembered it is 2011. RT @BSargentOKC: Why no app planned for the BlackBerry?

  72. Be a security hero: http://t.co/rSZRXss

  73. The world of the day today is: pleonasm.

  74. RT @rattle1337: Massive doc drop on Comment Crew (Chinese APT group). This is legit. I’ve dealt with some of these C2s. http://t.co/y1iN9U5

  75. “Inside every introvert is an extrovert that can be brought out by a encouragement and shame.” – something some extroverts actually believe

  76. @MikD @mckt_ I wanna hit some v0’s* soon †.

    • My hands are sweating cause I thought about climbing.
      † We gotta get there early to boulder.
  77. She says, “Oh, never mind about that heart-warming scientific study, I read the the data: they only sampled 16 people.”

    Would marry again.

  78. RT @rands: When you say “Offsite”, I hear “Boondoggle”.

  79. There are 10 kinds of people at #defcon: Those who wash their hands when given a chance and those responsible for all disease propogation.

  80. @chipmonkey @mikd shucks, blushin’ a bit, honestly.

  81. I’M GOING TO LAS VEGAS FOR B-SIDES LV AND DEFCON, AND I HAVE OPINIONS.

  82. I run rsyslog, dnsmasq, ipfw, and nat, w/ my own LaunchDaemons on my mac mini home server/firewall. Does OS X Lion Server have equivalents?

  83. I like to think there’s an accepted American spelling of deluxe without the ‘e’ that means ‘just kinda alright I guess’.

  84. Hey pal, don’t be blue, you know there are plenty of fish in the MECC Odell Lake.

  85. @gnachman iTerm2 is amazing.

    Q: Without Terminal’s hold-⌥ geometric-select, I toggle Vim’s number/nonumber a lot.

    Am I missing something?

  86. The only unlocked-computer tomfoolery I endorse is ponies: http://t.co/n3s44ma

    And I just got got: http://t.co/UBwtH0r

  87. RT @jasonmustian: When Clippy sees something, Clippy says something. http://twitpic.com/5wos5r

  88. Q. Where does anti-content come from?

    A. That’s a stupid question
    A. You’re stupid
    A. I’m stupid!
    A. RTFM!
    A. Just Use My System™
    A. spam

  89. “No, right!”
    “Yeah, I’m avoiding a pothole, I’m not retarded.”
    “Honey, I know that: if you were retarded I wouldn’t yell at you.”

  90. RT @ibogost: Cow Clicker shares a birthday with Marshall McLuhan.

  91. OH “Well the first thing I did was make sure it wasn’t from you guys because I don’t trust you guys after all these Hasselhoffs.”

  92. Brian Eno. “I’ll Come Running To Skip This Song.” Another_Green_World. LP. Produced by Brian Eno, Rhett Davies. Island Records., 1975

  93. “Hey Dad, why is every article on the web two pages long? Some are even more!”

  94. OH: I’m pretty sure there have only been three licenses to ill issued and you weren’t issued one.

  95. iif you unddESCxAierstand this messegeESCdbxAmessageESCbbbdwilove ESCA, you’ll love: http://t.co/3KC6H8L

  96. RT @darendoc: If NASA had any guts, they would dress the landing crew at Edwards as Apes to receive the Astronauts on their last Shuttle …

  97. N.B. When being watched, e.g. this-telephone call or-email may be monitored: be sure to mention that my voicemail isn’t set up.

  98. “@chipmonkey: …read this: RT @csima: 1password explains the new Dropbox terms http://t.co/JI9sr1S”

    Be wary of outrage: http://t.co/Enh0g5V

  99. I know it’s a function of anonymous text hosting sties but ASCII figlet banners 15 years into this hypertext experiment is just precious.

  100. Corporate Buddyspeak is a pidgin of Businessman’s Cant.

    Cool? Cool.

  101. Browser navigation via the backspace/delete key is an anachronism from the non-interactive web. http://t.co/GnXYrAz

  102. @mckt_ Sky-pour a beer toasting MECC to start, take a sip for every death (oxen or human), a shot every time you hunt, & chug river fordings

  103. Lesbians honk car horns like this, faggots honk car horns like that.

  104. This is a great vibe: “I feel fortunate that…my aspirations are beneath my accomplishments.” http://t.co/Op2KzI3

  105. @sxs3200 no, pics now!

  106. RT @rands: “We’re a start-up, so fuck it.”

  107. “If you’re relying on not clicking cows, you’re probably deluding yourself.” - Grant Stavely, CEO of Cow Clicking.

  108. RT @waxpancake: I was threatened with a lawsuit over Kind of Bloop’s pixel-art cover and settled for $32,500. So I wrote about it: http: …

  109. RT @strcpy: http://t.co/5OD2Kk9 best patch ever! via @jathanism

  110. Mouth breathing is harder than it looks.

  111. I still mentally append “online” when telling someone where I saw something.

  112. @saysaylobbyist BOYS RULE, GIRLS DROOL!

    (And congratulations!)

  113. My review of the Bodega Bay Inn, in Bodega Bay, CA: It’s not very bright to put a skylight in the bedroom.

  114. Man, I hate when people are passive aggressive about stuff.

  115. Reverse the arrow of time on your security products; as they travel back in time their effectiveness will approach the vendor’s claims.

  116. @chipmonkey @mckt_ I’m omega. I suck at con attendance, report delivery in 30 minutes or less, accessibility, “what ever” as two words, sco–

  117. RT @bbaskin: @charmsec A wiki? You guys have totally sold out.

  118. @philip_daigle A new place? One we just never noticed? I need a review.

  119. @frednecksec congrats on the level up and welcome to game security.

  120. @sxs3200 bike thieves are the worst thieves. Sorry for your loss.

  121. RT @automine: Version 0.9 of @Aplura’s getwatchlist #Splunk custom command now available. Now with HTTP auth and proxy support. http://b

  122. TN SEEKS DEROGATORY SLANG FOR HETERO

    http://t.co/G7WwEGm ¹

    ¹ Link to source, not to aggregation blog that doesn’t link or cite source.

  123. NB The fifth @Yelp star is reserved for happy endings—but only if the price is reasonable, service is prompt, and they fake it really well.

  124. RT @hotdogsladies: Viz., anyone informing 146MM readers that “technology” is making them dumb better be drawing it on the wall of a cold …

  125. It’s impolite to tease eschatologists, e.g. Mayans, Buddhists, Christians, before they announce the date of doomsday on The History Channel.

  126. RT @thanland: ▇▇▇▇▇▇▇
    Percentage of charts in tweets that are worthless, versus time.

  127. RT @hodgman: RT @steven_moffat:" http://t.co/0Xyyy7H Douglas Adams: 10 years gone, and still ahead of us.”

  128. Rotate all abstract art 90° clockwise today. Exception granted if it’s on a wire: go 180° instead.

  129. Rough estimate of the Sony breach: 77M records compresses to ~8Gb.

    Not counting penetration, that’s a sub-30 minute heist.

    Don’t blink.

  130. Kinda wanna know how to open a beer with a Bic, but don’t wanna take the oath to never use a bottler open again even if one is available.

  131. RT @ninjamixdump: Beastie Boys / Collected Balkan Mash / http://t.co/4Kg1Lsu / a FFTANG! FFTANG! round-up

  132. @electricfork THREEPIO: Secret mission? What pants? What are you talking about? I’m not getting in there!

  133. @electricfork Commander, tear this ship apart until you’ve found those pants
    and bring me the Ambassador. I want her alive!

  134. @electricfork A long time ago, in pants far, far away…

  135. ★★★★★

    WARNING: DJs are trained professionals. Don’t try this at home: http://t.co/SAsV0pZ

    (@therealKidKoala and @teeronce on @BISradio.)

  136. http://t.co/ehmH0b6
    Many of these persons are apparently normal, except for their desire to write endless rows of ciphers.
    @bestofwikipedia

  137. @MikD I think it’s more like force applied by brutes

  138. RT @biorhythmist: 24th & Mission is the Mos Eisley of BART stops.

  139. OH: “Rubber hose cryptanalysis”

  140. … o̶u̶t̶ ̶h̶a̶t̶e̶:̶ ̶o̶n̶l̶y̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶e̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶d̶o̶ ̶t̶h̶a̶t̶.̶"̶ ̶-̶M̶a̶r̶t̶i̶n̶ ̶L̶u̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ ̶K̶i̶n̶g̶,̶ ̶J̶r̶.̶

    SEE ME AFTER CLASS

  141. @ThinkandDrive That’s awesome. What kind are you growing?

  142. @CrucialCarl Scotch is gross. Scotch drinkers are gross. The process of making scotch is a waste of perfectly good beer, oak, and time.

  143. JAMS cleverly vandalize the sensors and circuitry in automatic bathroom faucets installed by the Freemasons to sterilize the working class.

  144. RT @attritionorg: RT @SushiDude: One SCADA screenshot I saw reminded me of Farmville. I wanted to click random icons incessantly. SCADA …

  145. The warmest weekend in spring I ever spent was the weekend I spent in Riviera Maya at a friend’s wedding.

    • David Foster Wallace
  146. Having a beer at work so that I can say cheers to @nutsec.

    NB: No, my beer does not have a watermelon in it. http://t.co/EhhFGle

  147. RT @kevinweil: Best @quora answer I’ve seen.

    Q: “What’s it like to be the smartest person in the room?”
    A: "It sucks. It means you’re i …

  148. Huff just $0.00 9/10 of unleaded 87 octane, and being arrogant about attaining the privilege of a carless lifestyle seems swell.

  149. @vurtyou and I have an extra ticket to the @SFSymphony this afternoon at 2PM.

    ♫ Symphonie fantastique ♫

    http://t.co/4BqQoVB

  150. As an online discussion of security authorization grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving unlocked front doors approaches 1.

  151. @MikD “Gentlemen, Please Dress Your Caste”

    <smug>You will never, ever, see me in mass, or in restaurants that require jackets.</smug>

  152. “Who is John Frum?”

  153. If you don’t already have everything AOL owns in your Scream Like A Man (or equiv.) filter, now’s the time to add it: http://t.co/WKg7hE2

  154. “@electricfork: I have a new gig. I’ll be joining the team at NERC on May 2nd. I’ll be doing neat things.”

    Congratulations!

  155. Authenticity is a sham of quality.

  156. LOREM IPSUM DOLOR SIT AMET FNORDUM. CETERIS PARIBUS EST REDUCTIO AD ABSURDUM.

  157. RT @wardspan: security twits - I am looking for Incident Response peeps - it’s an awesome opportunity - great team -amazing company - ht …

  158. Just sat down in the waiting room at the dentist and Thriller came on as if cued. I’m thinking about making a run for it.

    1. _____ is the greenest way to conserve water.

    A) Flushing on two only
    B) Reusing towels
    C) Building a city in the fnord
    D) Tweeting

  159. RT @iFail: I wonder how long before someone comes about with the Certified Advance Persistent Threat exam… LOL CAPT, aye aye

  160. Duck lips.

  161. @christopherkunz right?! He stared down the two Mexican bottles as if trying to remember commercials he’d seen about 'em.

    —Airport bars.

  162. “A Corona, please.”

    “We only have Sol and Dos Equis sir.”

    Paralysis.

    “Make it a Bud Light. No. Make it a Guinness.”

  163. I mean really carders! What’s the deal with designer clothes AND wallmart.com stuff? Practicality?!

    #Every90sComicExperiencingCreditFraud

  164. Q: What do you say to the only vendor you recently payed with a credit card when the card fraud-alerts days later?

    A: “Gesundheit.”

  165. OH: “We got the hack shitted out of us.”

  166. No tech hacking: 53 people have brought cats, dogs, gerbils, and birds named Sparky to this emergency animal hospital in Inner Sunset.

  167. Philip Glass = I could repeat that + I could repeat that

  168. The man in me doesn’t see the problem with the homunculus fallacy.

  169. A: …the world is really a client supported on a giant server.

    Q: What is the server standing on?

    A; It’s client/server all the way down!

  170. And I looked, and behold, a pale horse: and his name that sat on him was standard Javascript without jQuery, and Hell followed with him.

  171. I don’t understand the bowl-on-a-table, off-center-faucet, no-aerator bathroom sink thing. It seems dada to me.

    Hope that helps.

  172. “I don’t know that you can make the argument that you aren’t being adequately compensated because they are withholding bacon.”

  173. Try to pretend that primary sources are at least important enough to merit a link from the blog post about the article about the essay abou—

  174. On the Internet, everyone is a numerologist.

  175. I’ve proudly “bootstrapped” Simplepedia into a Chrome extension but hate javascript.

    So, uhm…

    “Entrepreneur seeks technical co-founder.”

  176. I nominate wikipedia’s 140 character table replacement for the <blockquote> tag as the best HTML5 troll of 2011.

    Look at those cute '"'s!

  177. <table>
    <tboody>
    <tr>
    <td>“</td>
    <td>Q</td>
    <td>”</td>
    </tr>
    </tbody>
    </table

  178. This year my bracket pick is a sure thing: ]

    Always go with a closer.

  179. RT @tqbf: Patrick, in Japan: Japanese doesn’t have a word for excessive preparation. http://bit.ly/dUtN9m

  180. Vintage trolling: “@mckt_: Just for the record, Stairway to Heaven is still the best song of all time.”

    Does anybody remember laughter?

  181. @MikD it, ironically, cannot be explained.

    Sure is a beautiful day out there.

    Lunch?

  182. Apple iTunes Human Interface Guideline rule 36: Consistently remind users about A-Ha’s “Take On Me” when clearing search terms.

  183. 1 Mysterianism states that some problems can’t be explained

    2 This is a problem

    3 Mysterianism can’t be explained

    4 Mysterians are jerks

  184. RT @johnemcintyre: At The Atlantic, Jeffrey Goldberg has what must be the last word on Newt Gingrich, the passionate patriot: http://tin

  185. Homuncular preformationism: an amazingly poetic belief I’d ascribe to a cooky conservative character were I a novelist.
    http://t.co/Zn8dpG4

  186. Queuing single file at a bar with three bartenders sends two signals: you don’t know how bars work, and I’m at a nicer place than usual.

  187. Tried the Symantec DBC: 75,000 person firm with no security plan, or C.S.O., doing it all wrong: 9.9% month chance of data breach.

    Welp,

  188. @chipmonkey whoa, nicely done (and I’m glad it wasn’t in our game.)

  189. RT @sethmnookin: Docs telling parents who don’t vaccinate to go elsewhere b/c don’t want to put other kids at risk. http://ht.ly/48FPy v …

  190. twitter posting = I could tweet that + yeah but you shouldn’t

  191. RT @CrucialCarl: Dear WIRED: I never thought this would happen to me. There are 3 women in my kitchen discussing firmware upgrades.

  192. Q. “@petrillic: It’s 2010, why do people still have issues with telephone conferences?”

    A. Because they are all soul crushing nightmares.

  193. This dude, who doesn’t know my jargon used his own lingo for my jargon.

    Eat a dick dude! What’s so hard about it? I learned it!

    Barbarian!

  194. 'pataphysics: J. G Ballard — “The Assasination of John Fitzgerald Kennedy Considered As A Downhill Motor Race”

    http://t.co/tDk0NWt

    Owns.

  195. My favorite Baudrillard moves excepting the Borges ones are the 'pataphysics ones because 'pataphysics is purely trolling metaphysics. Owns.

  196. Joseph and Emma and Fanny and Lucinda and Louisa and Zina and Presendia and Agnes and Sylvia and Mary and Patty and …, not Adam and Steve!

  197. http://t.co/EvZxrco

    Done.

    Friends, I had fun reading it, but some of Baudrillard’s ideas are altogether a bit too solipsistic. And silly.

  198. ★★★★★ In The Footsteps of the Ethio-Jazz Innovator

    P. good fora buncha dudes playin bread-instruments right-handed. http://t.co/KPIVvWh

  199. Make a @cslewisdaily RT account, about coffee: (http://t.co/JdbFr5w).

    Philosophically, I dislike C.S. Lewis too much to do it myself.

  200. “Look at a computer in a microscope. Where are the 1s and 0s? I don’t see any. I want my damned money back, right?”

    —Searle, PHIL132

  201. “@rands: http://t.co/CAkF45P (@mantia)”

    F5 it a bit.

  202. A “NO I WILL NOT FIX YOUR COMPUTER” T-shirt almost always means “YES I WILL FIX YOUR COMPUTER. What version are you running? Did you try r—”

  203. Chart Sweep: http://t.co/2szdsrh

    Five seconds of every number one 45 RPM record from 1965 through the 1990s.

  204. This month’s arduino @charmsec sign from @useNachos: http://t.co/8KCpo00

    “It’s so small!”

  205. RT @parisdjs: Hidden Orchestra - Night Walks On Vinyl Mixtape - another extravaganza mix from Tru Thoughts !! http://t.co/yeYbUNi via @p …

  206. In the Queen’s English, men don’t use airport paperback book title catchphrases like “Perfect Storm” and “Black Swan.”

    http://t.co/P3SmN4m

  207. @ssoper I’ve never heard of one. What the heck are you doing that would make that handy?

  208. I love the “stay tuned” web-trope. A plea for readership, hilariously anachronistic, self-aware of the volume of ‘other’.

    Stay tuned.

  209. Excel Line Plotting 101

    • Unbold all text
    • Set all fonts to 12pt
    • Delete gridlines, ticks
    • Set all lines to 1/4pt
    • Curse
    • Shake fist

  210. @MikD I’ll concede poor adoption/execution. Decimal time maybe. Mostly, I’m nostalgic: In the 1990s The Internet was gonna revolutionize *.

  211. In swatch™ “Internet Time”, at the tone, the time will be “completely irrelevant.”

    tick

    tick

    tick

    BEEP!

  212. I’ve gotten this e-mail multiple times a semester for /years/. http://t.co/4nJnvB5

    Not taught at my almost-alma-mater: Reverse Psychology.

  213. RT @frednecksec: Public heath infra (just like power, water, transportation, finance & defense) needs a strong govt hand. Profit motive …

  214. The first rule of prison-club: Wave, catcall, and whistle at new protagonists in order to highlight the character’s environmental change.

  215. Best guess: An all-knowing future-me went back in time and subtly tricked past-me to get cats for some positive reason yet to be revealed.

  216. @danphilpott very good point.

    I should unique & random password reset answers too.

    My mother’s maiden name is “cHbCIudCwTH5KuLVFPkUib3Ei.”

  217. I’ve changed nearly every non-work-related-account I have to unique 25 character passwords w/ @1Password + @dropbox. ☺

    http://t.co/uOuYehy

  218. Ignoring the synecdoche of “arms” as weapons, arms races are probably cooler than legs races.

    “This isn’t a scene, it’s a handstand 100M!”

  219. Guy next to us cited Star Trek Voyager in an analogy to explain some “XOR Crypto” he’d written to his date.

    Sweet 24th century reference!

  220. On the MUNI 22, I always assume the person talking to no one has a DSM IV disorder first, s’on the phone second, or’s talking to THEM third.

  221. HMDP RESPONSE CODES

    401 “Yes, but what does “cloud” mean?”
    402 “Yes, but what does “hacker” mean?”
    403 “Yes, but what does “cyber” mean?”

  222. RFC-2011
    HYPER META DICTIONARY PROTOCOL

    A standard for the format of debates about what words mean, for the avoidance of actual discussion.

  223. Life changing productivity hack exclusive: after the bump.

    Navigating up and down in Twitter.app? The ‘j’ and ‘k’ keys work too.

  224. Best response to ‘cyber’ yet.

    RT @teabag303: RT @shoebox: @teabag303 I just want it to mean digital sex again 😦

  225. @oneeyedcarmen Click your Cows™, folks!

  226. Ah, driving all the time; it adds a certain ‘Foutez le camp de mon chemin, vous trou du cul’ to the day doesn’t it?

    honk honk

  227. I don’t get it.

    Even if I read every line of Dagny Taggart’s dialog as a that’s-what-she-said, “Atlas Shrugged” still isn’t that funny.

  228. @snowfl0w all header tags not added by systems under your control could’ve been forged? Yesterday was Oct. in non-US date format: 10/2/2011?

  229. “Ramen sweats.”

  230. RT @djcheeba: new audio visual mix "Revenge of The Nerd’ is now live! http://fb.me/DXBQ25NF

  231. Ha! Caused by or from me?

    @jjthomas: @grantstavely While I have no voodoo doll, perhaps it is karmic retribution for the IMs I used to get.

  232. Alright, who’s got the @grantstavely voodoo doll? I haven’t had a sore throat like this in fifteen years.

  233. RT @wardspan: Zynga is looking for: Security Operations Engineer
    http://jobvite.com/m?3IGv1fwE #job

  234. RT @wardspan: Zynga is looking for: Security Incident Response Engineer
    http://jobvite.com/m?3OGv1fwK #job

  235. BREAKING, 2023: WORLD’S SMALLEST VIOLIN REVEALED TO BE IN THE PRIVATE COLLECTION OF BAY AREA TECHNOLOGIST AND EX-CAT OWNER

  236. Hed: HOUSE FAILS TO PASS EXTENSION OF PATRIOT ACT
    Dek: Tea Party and Democrats defeat GOP
    Lede: In a stunning tur…
    Nut Graf: Just kidding.

  237. @censey Holy Jeeze! What is that thing? Does it really grind every pot’s beans before brewing?

  238. @grahamvsworld sounds like you need Scream Like A Man: http://grantstavely.com/scream-like-a-man

    A bypass for the SEO’d content-free web.

  239. Nice chiasmus in the last sentence of Anon’s HBGary release.

    As for the rest of it, “respectfully”, the mixed-metaphors were distracting.

  240. RT @tommyalanson: The New American Wine Glass | The Hairpin http://t.co/NR5dmLs

  241. @grahamvsworld Where!?!

  242. Once I started looking for metonymy and synecdoche, I found them everywhere, and began to resent that I hadn’t noticed them before.

  243. @vurtyou wants to do an art project sticking anonymous love notes under random car’s wipers.

    I approve.

  244. So, svn commit walks into a bar, and the bartender says "…

  245. RT @treyford: Know any security engineers interested in incident response, operations or ecrime? We are hiring. Contact me or @wardspan

  246. @censey haha, normally I’d nuke it, but after Shmoo I needed a real cup of coffee: rebrew.

  247. @censey I thought mine died the morning I got home from Shmoo. I’d forgotten to put water in it.

    (Stainless carafe: cold, OLD coffee.)

  248. RT @danphilpott: The weakest part of any argument by analogy is the analogy.

  249. @wotowiec what’d you think of Daemon?

  250. “in the event of someone causing something to be wrong with a drain, oxygen masks will drop from the overhead compartment.”

  251. RT @toronado: event: Lagunitas SF Fusion Wed 2011/02/16 6:00pm, w/SF Fusion Imperial IPA brewed by Toronado Staff + other Lagunitas sele …

  252. My flight in Chicago: “There is something wrong with a drain, we have to stop boarding now and call maintenance.”

    Australian plane?

  253. Friday? Oh, nothin’, just hung out with some friends, launching a trebuchet using a robot. http://t.co/WtUVF6T

  254. @ddeighton I think @philip_daigle would’ve been heartbroken if there were no Shmooballs this year, but there definitely are.

    They’re red.

  255. “Where the information or data content, or, level, is low, the fill-in, or participation, is high.”

    —McLuhan

    http://t.co/8jP8XIG

  256. I’ve unlocked:

    • Red eye flight
    • 9 hour layover
    • Luggage left in the prior airport by the airline during the 9 hour layover

    +40 XP!

  257. I’ve lost about 8 pounds since last year’s @Shmoocon. If you think you see me but aren’t sure: the secret phrase is “Grant? Is that you?”

  258. Save me a seat at @CharmSec tonight.

  259. @oneeyedcarmen Congrats!!

  260. “Sometimes you get so lonely—‘wank-wank’ guitar solo”

    — @vurtyou, singing along with Bowie

    “What? That’s what his songs are!”

    — @vurtyou

  261. Clever Porta-John owner: This time, I’ll drop it off door-down so’s nobody breaks in and pees in it!

    Clever crack-head: I can pee on this!

  262. Shmoo’s CON-FLU (OK, it’s probably just a cold) is so strong I already have it.

  263. @oneeyedcarmen @quadling I’m barcoded already. Thanks!

  264. Show, don’t tell.

    RT @washingtonpost: Milbank: I’m declaring February a Palin-free month. Join me, take the pledge! http://wapo.st/eLSl3w

  265. @MikD my saying that after not making the 5.10a was a bit crazy. Next time I’m getting a laminate belay card, and shooting for another 10a.

  266. I’ve spent the last few years building up an immunity to New Jack Swing in mixes like Wesley did with iocane powder.

    It’s a superpower.

  267. Ten hacks for cool new gadgets you need, including a facebook-killer, which may or may not be “dead”, after the “jump”: http://t.co/kgwdvzV

  268. Led Zeppelin: ★★★★★
    Acts heavily influenced by Led Zeppelin: ★★☆☆☆

    The Beach Boys: ★★☆☆☆
    Acts heavily influenced by The Beach Boys: ★★★★★

  269. @frednecksec sorry, that knuckle-headed nonsense was re: “Continue to be amused by folks that RT my paper.li spam…”—I agree, it’s amusing.

  270. THANKS FOR OPTIMIZING MY PERSONAL BRAND ON ENGINES AND STUFF #FF @FREDNECKSEC

    Page: 1 2 3

    Myself: facebook twitter RSS reddit

  271. Jorge Luis Borges’s “The Library of Babel” is currently my favorite text, but I’ll keep looking.

    http://t.co/FFzxWOp

  272. Whenever someone tells me to check out something on a Beatles album, I recall the heyday of Johannes Sebastian Bach’s with his compositions.

  273. Dvorak’s insights about facebook are about as useful as your parent’s insights about music.

    Factual: Yes.

    A convincing argument: No.

  274. OH @grahamvsworld (with arms raised): HISTORGRA-a-vibrato-A-a-A-a-AMS!

    jazz-hands

  275. Feeling stupid for booking an SFO->DCA flight landing at 10pm the same night as @charmsec in Baltimore.

    Considering the flight-change fee.

  276. Started The Image Of The City, saw shiny, now my LaTeX resume uses \frenchspacing and \raggedright.

    I made it through Chapter 1 at least.

  277. Gang: If we all switch to CFL bulbs, the energy traders managing long term price contracts will get better bonuses.

    Let’s pull together!

  278. This imperial stout I kegged in November, SILLY BLACK T-SHIRTS ONLY, tastes great.

    But it reads my e-mail, won’t fix my computer, o.O, &c.

  279. Corrections

    A toot on Monday suggested that I was in need of a Shmoocon barcode. I now have one. Two @charmsec regulars are still looking.

  280. This Snuggie keeps falling off when I walk around.

  281. Know of a @shmoocon barcode for sale?

    I’m buying.

    #thanksamillion #havebeentoeveryshmoocon #sadpanda #shmoocon

  282. @kingtuna @charmsec Sadly, Murphy’s won’t be close this year, @shmoocon is at a different hotel. (And I’m hoping to still get a barcode.)

  283. Ent Porn: http://flic.kr/p/96x4Me

    (at San Carlos and 18th St.)

  284. @ddeighton @bbaskin @reyjrar just watched Beer Wars.

    Show, don’t tell: unheeded.

    Axe grinding.

    I dig Sam, Charlie, Jim, Steve, &c.

    ★★★☆☆

  285. MLITBOG: http://goo.gl/GuhFN

    One 90s design antipattern after another, culminating in a broken remix player: http://goo.gl/LhKka.

    Sad. ☹

  286. TLDR;CON

    No barcodes, no lanyards, no balls: join me at the TDL Bar outside @shmoocon: Like a citysec, but at a con.

    http://goo.gl/KatOg

  287. All tickets allocated for this round of sales have been reserved. The next round of ticket sales will be on WEDNESDAY, DEC 1st, at NOON EST.

  288. Caught a ride tonight with a hack unmarked Towncar with three packs of Malboros instead if a meter. Giving him directions to not kidnap us.