[eating scrambled eggs after walking on shells bare foot after salt and peppering three eggs in the carton, which just bounces off the shells all over the counter, then picking them up, cracking them into the pan and tossing the shells over my shoulder] “I don’t get it!”

followed shortly by “wow, it really feels like I gotta walk around on egg shells around here lately”

every magazine and paper of record rides (enjoys a great reputation amongst libs) or dies (enjoys a great reputation amongst libs that they resent having to defend) by their opinion board’s takes and when their opinion board’s takes are hot garbage for workers, they die.

[to the “… do it like this” bumper sticker creative team] they’re ripping you off over on the internet

heed my tale: I deleted a bunch of signal chats a few days ago including the ghost of One Big Signal from three years ago and now i’m haunted by the ghost of 6 shitposts which I cannot mark as read

speed reading is… incredibly fake, isn’t it? (i threw the ellipses in there to throw off any speed readers on the TL)