peeking into the party around the person I don’t know who opened the door: Hey!

Slightly later over a beer: uh, so what do you do? (people love this question)

Oh me? I’m a founder. We make [unintelligible]. Haha, yeah, no, it’s software for cold calling people. No yeah it still “works” ha ha ha. You don’t answer your phone? Wow do you mind if I double-click on that, I [looks into the camera] “do not get it” (I’m trying to make my catchphrase go viral at the party)

Ah, jeeze, these hamsicks and circle-As are really picky about having the crust cut off of their diagonal cut PB&Js and the skins peeled off of their apple slices and etc, and etc. I really [looks into the camera] “do not get it” (I’m trying to make my catchphrase go viral)

inventing a new “federal housing insurance corporation” as a thought experiment and being tackled and beaten unconscious by 90 Stanford grad founder-in-bio posters wearing Fnord brand “punch left" gear I didn’t even know sports basement sold because that part of the store is invisible to me, a normal person

four other braun clocks throughout the house (the only other clocks in the house)

this guy is picky as hell about clocks