pizza slow (high quality)
  1. i didn’t make the connection between college degrees in the U.S. and meritocracy (pejorative), probably because I never finished college (ran out of patience and tuition)

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  2. originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  3. a speed metal cover of the fireman sam theme transposed to minor key, played by fireman sam’s band, with the “oh no” rising theme palm muted intro

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  4. [Verse 1: Peter Cetera] If you leave me now You’ll take away the biggest part of me Ooh no, baby, please don’t go [Verse 2: Peter Cetera] And if you leave me now You’ll take away the very heart of … 🌽🐛

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  5. apropos of nothing word associations: “public-private partnership”, lmao

    “privatized”, lmfao

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  6. san deanfrisco twitter funny as hell today, gj everyone, even the freaks and losers, you’ve been funny today too

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  7. therapist (I don’t go to therapy but pretending for the bit): “how did you get that hole in your jeans, it’s like, right by the zipper, and not even in a place that you can passably just like, let it go like a thigh or knee”

    me w/ donnie darko frown: doing the dishes I think, idk

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  8. originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  9. What about lenders who already paid off their congressional reps?

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)
  10. you should have to win the “catch a dollar bill” bar bet before you can turn on “autopilot” in a car, just like commercial airline pilots

    originally posted on mastodon over 3 years ago (permalink)